“i feel like utter crap”
Today is Thanksgiving and I’m grateful to be spending time with people I love. But I’m also feeling inspired to write about an emotion every one goes through.
You know… the bad days... when we just want to see the world burn when we have a crappy day, don't we. When we wake up and just wanna choose violence LOL. Whether you feel frustrated, annoyed, angry, bitter, resentful, sad, or just plain horrible right now, here are 5 ways that might lift those dark spirits up. There's no harm in trying these different tactics, and hey, you might just discover a new habit to improve yourself.
#1, meditation.
Ok, ok, before you run off thinking, "Oh my god, this is the 100th millionth time someone told me to meditate, ugh, meditation is so slow and boring!!!!!" Just... just give me a chance to explain. First, I understand your point. The first time I tried meditating, jeez, I had the attention span of a goldfish, and if you use social media every day, you probably do too.
Speaking of which, every company and person who is trying to sell something online or in person is doing what ever they can to grab your attention the most, whether with bright colors, interesting slogans, or downright sleazy psychology mind tricks. So that explains that.
Anyways, the first time I tried meditating, I couldn't concentrate. Like at all. During the first five seconds spent on the Headspace app, I literally turned off the audio and went back to scrolling through Instagram because I couldn't handle the slow speaking lady and not having something new thrown at my face every single time my finger flicked.
Pretty sad now that I think about it, but hey, I've come a long way from those goldfish days. Practicing meditation teaches you how to be patient and how to clear your mind of intrusive and rushing thoughts. Even right now, I'll give ya 10 seconds. During these 10 seconds, try not to think of anything and just focus on your breathe and only your breathe. Okay, here we go.
~ 10 seconds pass ~
So how was that? Was it hard? Did that little annoying voice in your head try to make you grab some Oreos instead of staying still?
So the more you work on this focused state, the more you can start to train your mind to stay clear of useless thoughts and really just hone in on the present. During this time, it's also possible for new ideas and thoughts to come into your mind that you might put to use later on.. but no matter what, stay focused on your breathe and let the thoughts walk on by. Try doing this for five minutes, and you may be surprised at how your mind and body feel afterwards. I'll put the benefits of meditation in the Resources section.
#2 to help you feel better than you do right now, is journaling.
Journaling is suuuper underrated in my opinion. But, if you're like me and you haven't picked up a pen since graduating university, you probably try to avoid any writing projects because your hand gets tired after writing like 2 sentences. In that case, try starting with doodling if you don't mind venturing into your artistic side.
Otherwise, if you don't mind the writing part, grab a journal if you have one, or just a piece of paper, and any writing utensil. Yea I advise you not to do journaling on your laptop because it's so much easier and direct just to illustrate and see your thoughts out on paper in front of you without having to deal with the technical part of making the lines straight or making some perfect shapes on your online document.
So on your paper, write today's date, and just write how you're feeling. Write down what's got you feeling so angry or sad and how you feel about the whole situation. Remember, your journal won't judge you. You can say all the shit you want about a person or a company and no one will know. Besides, we're here to focus on you and improving your mood, not anyone else's, okay?
I personally find journaling and making some small art fun and interesting because it gets my opinions and thoughts out on paper and visually in front of me. After I've gotten my negative thoughts out of the mentally cramped up space in my head and out onto the paper, I'm able to have this 3rd party perspective of my feelings. My mood tends to lighten up and I get to act like I'm a separate friend helping to maneuver the situation a bit more calmly.
#3 is exercise.
If you're an athlete like me, you probably find exercise extremely helpful for improving your mood. It's also scientifically proven that working out brings out endorphins, basically the "happy" hormones, as well as a lot of other good stuff, like serotonin and releasing the hormones that make you feel crappy and angsty.
My main go-to form of exercise is boxing. Yea I could run, I could dance, I could lift weights. But I don't like running and boxing is something that makes me want to go all out and I feel so, so powerful after doing it. Point being, pick a physical activity you actually LIKE doing. Don't run for an hour just cuz your best friend loves to run while you hate it.
Don't force yourself into a yoga class just because you see it all over Instagram when in reality you just feel like you're wasting your time. Pick an exercise you like and go for it, and be consistent with it. You'll not only see your body change for the better and love your body, but also you'll feel so much better than when you started. And who doesn't want to feel better?
#4 is talking to someone and reaching out for some help.
Do you have a one or two friends you trust in? If you haven't reached out to your friends to talk about feeling crappy or some bad thoughts you've been having, now might be the time. If you don't feel comfortable talking with them about mental health, you could just reach out asking if they wanna go see a movie or go on a brunch date.
I've noticed as an introvert that I definitely like having some alone time, but I also get really excited when I'm about to meet up with a close friend. Both alone time and social time bring me energy and it's important to have a balance of the two, especially if you're able to have someone to check-in with.
If you don't have someone you can rely on in this way, try checking out some options for therapy. And no, no, do not be ashamed of wanting to try therapy out. You're taking action to improve you, so throw those thoughts about what your judgmental neighbor Sally might think if she heard you were going to therapy. That's her problem.
Heck, she might even need some therapy herself, but I digress. Point is - no one should be ashamed of wanting to go to therapy. I've tried it and having that resource helped me feel better about my situation because I knew she was there for me and someone I could fall back on when all of my other tactics for improving my mood didn't work. There are plenty of free and paid options for therapy, both online and on your phone. I'll put the links in the Resources section.
#5 and the last tip I have for helping you feel better is acting towards a goal.
Having a goal in mind and something that you are working towards brings clarity and can help get you started on your journey of fulfillment too.
And yea I'm not talking about you people who think having a goal means getting a job at a top consulting company by the time you're 25. None of that corporate soul-sucking shit. I'm talking about the things that give you energy.
What would your life look like if you woke up every day excited? What's the one thing that makes your heart sing its loudest without shame?
What makes you jump up and down mentally or physically when you think about going for it? Yea - that. It might art, cooking, being a coach, reading, acting, playing with dogs, or organizing your aunt's cluttered attic! Anything! Find or create your passion and create goals to develop it.
Don't try to bring money out of it at first, otherwise, you're going to be stuck with trying to force yourself to monetize your passion and that's when your passion can start to feel forced and like work. Just work on improving your skills in this area and don't put pressure on it. Just run with it and use it to fuel you every day. You need to know what the goal or destination is before you plan on how you’re gonna get there.
Here for you,
Suzanne xo
Resources (not sponsored)
Benefits of meditation:
https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/meditation/in-depth/meditation/art-20045858
https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/12-benefits-of-meditation#1.-Reduces-stress
Bloom app (paid: 7 day free trial - $14.49/month or $60/year or $400 for lifetime access)
Headspace
Calm (free)
PodBean (free)
BetterHelp:
